Writing the Self Analysis: Gender

i)

Growing up I never felt that gender norms were imposed on me by my immediate family. My parents always were supportive when I had a Spider-Man obsession, made sure I knew how to change tires, mow the lawn, bought me and my sister Nerf guns, attended our sports events, and groomed us to cheer on the Boston Bruins. However, they also put us in ballet classes, piano lessons, taught us how to cook, got us Bratz dolls, and let us play with mom’s old makeup. I think that my childhood was an equal balance of "boy" activities and "girl" activities. I can relate to Chandria's Self Story 4 because of the way hat other girls see her as a "boy". I never touched makeup until grade 9 when I got to high school. I also thought that braids and makeup was a "girly-girl" thing growing up. I am reminded of my own story when the other girls in Chandria's story say that "she's such a boy." In my own story I talk about how much I liked Spider-Man as a kid. I wore Spider-Man clothes all the time, kept my hair short, and did not care much for girly-girl things either. Looking back at photos of me, I could easily be mistaken for a boy. I think that way Chandria wrote "I am not a boy. I am a girl who likes to play sports" is relatable to a lot of girls who enjoy "boy things". When I was little sometimes people would mistake me as boy. But I was just a girl who liked Spider-Man. Both mine and Chandria's stories explore the normative narrative that girls should like girl stuff. The girls in Chandria's story think it’s weird that she does not like hair and makeup stuff. And in my own story, my grand-parents think it’s weird that I would rather of Spider-Man toys than a Barbie. 

Another story that relates to my own is Karly's Self Story 4. In Karly's story she describes how she was nervous going to hockey practice. Once Karly realized that there were other girls at the practice she felt some relief form her anxiousness. I think that this is feeling a lot of girls can relate to. Like Karly I was one of three girls on my soccer team. When the other two girls didn't show up, I automatically felt out of place being the only girl. The phrase "you play like a girl" is used by boys to insult girls in their athletic abilities. I understand how this phrase automatically made Karly feel not good enough.

These patterns of girls being less accepted in "boy" sports is common among all ages. It is important that girls feel welcomed to try out for football and hockey and other "boy" sports. The normative narrative that "playing like a girl" is known to be an insult, but is in no way accurate.  There are so many amazing female athletes that continue to break the stereotype that "playing like a girl" is a bad thing. It is also important that boys feel he same welcoming when participating in "girl" activities like dance or ringette. 

ii)

Karly's story is a good example of the normative narrative that girls are often less accepted in "boy" sports than girls. Her story shows how boys often think that girls are not good enough to play with them and that they should keep to "girl" activities. Chandria does a good job of disrupting this narrative by playing on the boy’s football team. Football is almost always an all boy team and it is rare for a girl to being playing on a boy’s football team. Chandria does not care that she goes against the norm of being involved in "girly-girl" things like hair and make-up. She perseveres and is accepted by her team mates. I like Chandria's story because she thinks that the other girls are the weird ones for liking hair and makeup. 

Another story that breaks this normative narrative of girls should do dance and more "girl-like" activities is Minseo's. Minseo's mother is determined to have her participate in ballet. However, Minseo longs to play soccer with the boys and take taekwondo lessons. At the end of the story, Minseo goes against the norm of taking ballet and tells her mother to put her in taekwondo instead. An important part in Minseo's story is when she says, "It feels like I’m forced to be something that is not truly myself." Many girls probably feel this way when forced into a "girl" activity that they don't enjoy doing. The same goes for boys. They also can feel trapped doing activities that fit their gender role, when they could be longing to take dance lessons or cooking lessons. 

In the article "Girls Are Pink, Boys Are Blue: On Toddlers And Gender Roles", they say that it is "the social conditioning they receive that makes them pick up and internalize gender roles.”  This means that it is parents who how their kids what it is meant to be a boy and a girl. And what is expected of them in their gender. It is important that parents try to lessen this gap in gender roles because kids should be able to be involved in more than just certain activities that are common for their gender. Parents should continue to put their kids in the sports that they are interested in instead of what is “appropriate" for their gender. I think this quote is also important because parents should share the household duties so that their children can understand that it is okay for Dad to cook and clean, and for Mom to mow the lawn and wash the cars. People are more than their gender and they should be able to express themselves not according to gender roles.